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| Rachel asks... |
12/22/2008 6:59:49 PM |
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Dear Gabby: |
Dear Gabby, I'm just so confused, I don't know what to do anymore :(...Me and My Dad are Christians. And for some reason it feels like I have falling away from Jesus and I don't no what to do. I don't have ANY Christian friends..there for I don't have anyone to talk to about this :( My Brothers and Sisters Don't like to talk about it...AT ALL..I don't even no if there Christians And I don't no what to do. CAN YOU PLEASE HELP ME!
also, There was a time I was SO Close to God! And then I drifted away and I kinda hate myself for it. PLEASE HELP ME
thank you so much and God bless you!
-Rachel |
Answer: |
Dear Rachel,
Sometimes we become so distracted by situations, people, and things of the world, that we dont realize that we are being pulled in a different direction, that subtly leads us away from God. But God has not moved. He is faithful and unchanging and is always waiting to welcome us back when we stray. You may have drifted away for some time, but the good news is that you have now realized how much you miss, love, and need Him in your life. It is not too late to turn around and head right back towards Him, straight into His waiting arms. James 4:8 "Draw nigh to God, and he will draw nigh to you" Like any relationship, there must be communication and time spent together to keep it strong. Start getting back into the habit of prayer, communing with the Holy Spirit, reading your Bible and other activities that fill your mind and heart with things of the Lord. With each step toward Him, the distance you are feeling now will begin to diminish. Do not waste precious time dwelling in the past and beating yourself up for making mistakes. It solves nothing. God forgives and when He does, it is as far as the east is from the west. Accept His Grace, forgive yourself, and then pick up and carry on. Christian fellowship is a wonderful gift that God has provided us with, through which we gain support and encouragement from others who are walking along the same path that leads to Jesus. You may not have any Christian friends right now, but with just a couple clicks of your mouse, you can enter a place where you will find the fellowship and friendship that you are seeking with other Christians. There is an awesome Christian community here at Christianity Oasis, with forums, chatrooms, studies, music, and many many more features and programs that will nourish your soul and spirit and help you grow in your relationship with Christ. Pray more about this and come visit the Oasis chatrooms and forums : http://www.christianityoasis.com/members/forums/index.php |
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| HL asks... |
12/10/2008 8:07:29 AM |
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Dear Gabby: |
Hi. I just received Christ this year, a first generation in my household. My family members are very strong buddists and they disapprove of what I'd done. In fact, I haven't told my mum about it. God placed me in this a christian CCA in my school and it is a church and the only one for me since I am unable to attend a chruch yet.
The problem is I feel like a devil is grabbing hold of me, making me breathless. Once I almost gave up Christ and find it ultimately stupid thing to do. I struggle everyday to discipline myself to do my QT and be one christian but I can't seem to do it.
I am so soaked in sins.
I am straying badly and I need someone to talk to. My CCA members are born christians and for some reason I can't open myself to them or listen to them.
So I need your help here. perhaps just to see things more clearly because I don't exactly know where is the root of the problem. |
Answer: |
Dear HL,
One of the biggest misconceptions people have about Christianity is that you need to be perfect to follow Jesus. This is just not so, and the Bible gives us many examples of those who were chosen by God as prophets and disciples who were anything but perfect. God knows we are imperfect creatures, and He knows we will stumble and fall sometimes, yet He loves us so much He sent His Son to make a way for us to enter into heaven, as by the blood of Jesus we are washed clean and forgiven of our sins. We must accept God’s gift of Grace and Forgiveness, given to us when we confess and repent of our sins, and then we must forgive ourselves, pick up and move on. Don’t think that because others have been Christians longer than you have, that they are somehow exempt from trials and stumbles. We all have them, and will continue to have them as long as we are here on earth, but we cannot remain discouraged when we do. We must take the lessons of truth that come from these very stumbles, and use it to help us and others to overcome in the future. If you have strayed away, then it is time to turn back and get back on the path that leads to Jesus. Draw near to God and He will draw near to you. We have a Great program here, that will help you to strengthen your relationship with Jesus, and will bring peace understanding to your heart and mind regarding issues you may be struggling with. Pray more about this and please check out this awesome 100% free Christian Counseling program: http://www.christianityoasis.com/CCCC/Forum.htm |
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| Darlene asks... |
12/2/2008 10:44:56 AM |
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Dear Gabby: |
Hi Gabby,
I just read a question asked by Tammie from Jamaica. I noticed that you did not answer her question with the same kind of personal touch that you answered the others. Yes, I could be wrong, but if you would just reread them, you would know why I feel this way. God cares for us all the same way and so should we. No matter where we are from. |
Answer: |
Dear Darlene,
Thank you for writing in and sharing your concerns. Letters here are answered as the Spirit leads. One size does not fit all, so responses will vary according to the message that the Holy Spirit wishes to convey to each individual person and situation. One's nationality does not factor into the responses shared in this column, as I am in full agreement with your statement that we are to Love ALL as we are all made in His Image and equal in His eyes. That being said, I would also like to add that I am of Caribbean heritage, as Tammie is, and have been blessed by the diversity of cultures and races within this part of the world and can also understand the challenges that come along with that, having faced them myself. Where we come from, how we speak, color of eyes and skin... matters little, cuz God looks at the heart, and so do True followers of Christ. In accepting this truth we can find peace within OUR hearts. |
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| Joan Parkinson asks... |
11/11/2008 6:17:45 PM |
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Dear Gabby: |
1999 our adoptive son's sister came looking for him. By 2001 they were not brother and sister. by 2003 they married. His daughters are devastated. We tried to make things peaceful by attending the wedding as did the girls. Then in 2005 the daughter wanted to bring her biological Mom to visit. We have always been friends. Our son turned on us as did his wife who added lots of barbs. Now this year he has asked us for Christmas. I am reluctant to go, as I feel that we would be under too much stress, Both of us are heart patients and my husband a cancer survivor. Am I wrong to feel that I can not take anymore? |
Answer: |
Dear Joan,
It seems that your reluctance to attend your son’s Christmas gathering is based on the fear that what happened before will repeat itself. What if things turn out differently this time around? This may be a very good opportunity to heal old wounds and leave them where they belong, in the past, and you and your family can finally move forward. Even though your son’s decisions may have caused you a lot of pain, our Lord tells us that we must forgive, not just once or twice, but as many times as we would want to be forgiven. We all make mistakes, and for some, they never get the chance for reconciliation with their loved ones. You and your son have this chance now. Nothing is impossible with our Lord but we need to be willing to do our part as well. Don’t let fear or doubt, be the deciding factors in your decision. 1 Cor 13:7 ‘Love never stops being patient, never stops believing, never stops hoping, never gives up’. Pray about this and let the Lord lead your heart on this matter. |
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| lydia asks... |
11/1/2008 10:58:20 AM |
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Dear Gabby: |
Dear Gabby my mom is super strict and wont let me have any freedom .This cute boy wants to go out with me but my mom says no way I am 16 and I am going to be 17 nov,15 |
Answer: |
Dear Lydia,
The world tries to get us to believe that its way of doing things is true freedom, and that we are missing out on all the exciting things that others are able to do. One need only look around to see how this type of ‘freedom’ has impacted the lives of young people all over the world, who instead find themselves encaged, having to deal with consequences that they did not foresee, as the choices we make now can affect us for the rest of our lives. If this boy truly cares about you, he will be willing to get to know you as a friend first, until you are allowed to go out on dates together. Looks alone can be deceiving, so always take the time to check a person's fruits (their words and deeds). By honoring your mom’s wishes, and not breaking her rules, you will be showing her that she can trust you which she will take into future consideration, and you will also be letting any potential suitors know that you are not just any ole girl, but a young lady who respects herself and knows that she is worth waiting for. Pray lots about this, and let the Holy Spirit lead you into God's perfect will for your life.
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| tammie asks... |
10/29/2008 4:46:09 PM |
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Dear Gabby: |
hello, I live in Jamaica but I'm planning to study in the US. I need some advice on how to come up with 14,000 USD. I already have info on loans and I dont think that will work out for my situation, I am starting in January I will leave here as soon as I get my passport do you think I should work now That I'll be leaving soon? I havent seen my mom in 11 years and am worried about how i will react when I see her (that's when i go to college up there).I hope I can express all my problems I feel like I am burdened with them. see my dad died when I was 10 and my mom left for the US when i was 6 I have no brithers and sisters by my Mom's side and a couple by my dad's side but they dont talk to me I live my Uncle and his wife but they criticize me too much and they coop me up in the house like a baby I cant go anywhwere or do anything and I'M SEVENTEEN I feel alone and depressed I am also worried about going to the US I am not a very pretty girl I am afraid people wont accept me and I dont know how to dress like americans. also my Uncle in the US and his wife are expecting great things of me and I dont know what to do |
Answer: |
Dear Tammie,
Jesus shared something very important with us, that we must always keep close to our hearts when worry and fear begin to set in.
Matt 6: 26-34 "Look at the birds of the air; they do not sow or reap or store away in barns, and yet your heavenly Father feeds them. Are you not much more valuable than they? Who of you by worrying can add a single hour to his life? And why do you worry about clothes? See how the lilies of the field grow. They do not labor or spin. Yet I tell you that not even Solomon in all his splendor was dressed like one of these. If that is how God clothes the grass of the field, which is here today and tomorrow is thrown into the fire, will he not much more clothe you, O you of little faith? So do not worry, saying, 'What shall we eat?' or 'What shall we drink?' or 'What shall we wear?' For the pagans run after all these things, and your heavenly Father knows that you need them. But seek first his kingdom and his righteousness, and all these things will be given to you as well. Therefore do not worry about tomorrow, for tomorrow will worry about itself." Worry never helps us. It only works against us. It is Faith that moves those mountains. There is a saying: If God leads you to it, He will lead you through it. Trust that if this is God’s will for you, He will open the doors necessary for you to get where He wants you to go. Even if it seems impossible to us, God specializes in miracles and He can do above and beyond what we can ever imagine for ourselves. So let go of the worry and fears and place your faith in God who is in control of all things. Pray and ask God to provide for you, in accordance with His will and then believe that He will do so in His perfect time. |
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| Peyton Lewis asks... |
10/27/2008 2:23:49 PM |
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Dear Gabby: |
Gabby,
Thank you so much! you write awesome responses!
but now i have to ask you something a little personal, my boyfriend broke up with me yesterday because he said he wasn't feeling anything any more. A few days earlier, i had told him that i believed in sex after marriage, and he said that he did not. What if that was the REAL reason why he broke up with me? I cannont figure it out!
Please help me, because i cannot get over him, and it might be bad... |
Answer: |
Dear Peyton,
Never let anyone pressure you into compromising your beliefs, especially when they use Love as an excuse to do so. The Bible tells us what True Love should be :
1Cor 13: 4-8 “Love is patient, love is kind. It does not envy, it does not boast, it is not proud. It is not rude, it is not self-seeking, it is not easily angered, it keeps no record of wrongs. Love does not delight in evil but rejoices with the truth. It always protects, always trusts, always hopes, always perseveres.”
Though you may not know for certain the reason your boyfriend broke up with you, whatever his reason for doing so was, he has made his choice. You cannot change his decision, but you can choose to not let his choice negatively affect your life. God has someone special in mind just for you, and He will bring you both together in His perfect time. Your soul mate will respect you and support your decision to wait till after marriage to have sex, after all, sex is an expression of love meant to be shared within the covenant of marriage. When people choose to do otherwise, there are usually painful consequences. You have to trust in God’s plan for your life, and know that when things do not turn out the way you hoped, it is cuz God has something bigger and better waiting for you later on down the road. Your first Love, Jesus, is always with you and will never forsake you. Remember what He told us in Matthew chapter 6… God already knows our needs, and as long as we put Him first in our lives, all the rest will be given to us. Pray about this, and check out this awesome study on Soul Mates: http://www.christianityoasis.com/Keyword/SoulMates.htm |
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| kevin asks... |
10/26/2008 12:01:01 PM |
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Dear Gabby: |
i live mith my mom and my step dad during the weeks and my dad on weekends except the last weekend of the month, this has always been extremely hard on me. my step dad is constantly making fun of my weight when my mom isnt around, she drinks alot and so does he but they are never drunk, they are also both chain smokers and at some times it gets hard to breathe. my question is should i try to move in with my father and how do i go about telling my mom and that JERK that she married? |
Answer: |
Dear Kevin
Perhaps it is time to sit down with both your mom and your dad, and talk with them about how you feel. Be open and honest, and tell them what you are having a difficult time with. If moving in with your dad is something that you are considering, bring it up during the discussion. Don’t be scared. Pray more about this, and should you decide to talk with your parents, ask the Holy Spirit to give you the words and the courage you need to share what is on your heart with them. |
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| Peyton asks... |
10/22/2008 2:29:56 PM |
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Dear Gabby: |
Hello Gabby,
My school is also supporting questions for teens in our newspaper. The column is called, Dear Gabby. We are all very strong Christians (from what i know of)and we need questions for our newspaper. Can you help? |
Answer: |
Hi Peyton, It is very cool to hear that you are reaching out to other other teens who need help. An advice column can be a great way to help others, as it provides a convenient and anonymous way for people to ask their questions. Don’t think that because the teens at your school are Christian, that they do not have questions or need advice on certain issues. This Dear Gabby column receives many letters from Christians seeking godly counsel. Remember that Christians, even strong ones, have trials and stumbles as this is part of living a Christian life and following Jesus. So make sure and get the word out about your column, by promoting it in your newspaper, maybe put out a few flyers, and ask others to tell their friends and teen relatives about it. Let the teens know that it’s not just for non-believers, but for Christians as well. As always, pray about this, and ask the Holy Spirit to guide you in all things. God bless you Peyton. |
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| Lorna asks... |
9/22/2008 3:11:42 PM |
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Dear Gabby: |
Dear Gabby,
I really want to praise God and tell people about Jesus at school but I keep getting really nervous and end up not saying anything.
What should i do? |
Answer: |
Dear Christian in need, thank you for your letter I wanna first say how cool it is that you are seeking ways to stay and enjoy Church sermons and Sunday school, rather than looking for a way out of attending like lots of others folks do. Now I agree, it can be kinda tough sometimes, to sit still and listen to someone talk for 2 hours in a row, especially if we are bored by what they are talking about… BUT…What If it was God that was talking to you? What if He had special messages JUST for you and was going to reveal it during those two hours each Sunday morning? Imagine... the Creator of all things, the One who created you, wanting to teach you something important that you could use to help others and yourself later on, or maybe place on your heart a calling to serve Him. That would be quite exciting! Did you know that one of the ways God communicates with us is through other people? What if there was a message within the sermons and Sunday school lessons that God meant especially for you? What if it was something that you needed to hear, something that would bring you more understanding about who God is and what His plans are for you? See, if you look at it as two hours of people talking and you having to be quiet and sit still, its gonna seem really boring… But if you really think about what each lesson is, a Holy Spirit inspired message just for you, then instead of dreading each Sunday morning, you may actually want to go and hear what new and exciting Truth He is going to reveal to you. And it is also a time for you to be among other members of the Body of Christ where you can fellowship and make new friends. As with anything else, its all about our attitude towards it. What once seemed difficult, can actually be a blessing, if we choose to see it as such. Pray more about this and don’t forget that you have 24/7 access to God, not just when you attend Church and Sunday School. He is always there waitin to talk with you God bless you. |
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| Erica asks... |
8/17/2008 9:44:50 PM |
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Dear Gabby: |
Dear Gabby, I have been working with my co-worker for a year and a 1/2 and I feel that she has not liked me since I started. I feel as if I am being harrassed. We work in a medical office and I feel she is always out to get me.I am intimidated by her and have never felt comfortable to confront her alone because she is one who is never wrong and does't feel as if she has a problem. I have confronted my supervisor and manager about her on several occaions and I pray for her alot but, I feel as if I try to do things too much my own way. I have a meeting with my boss's boss tommorow and I don't hate her I don't want her to get fired, I don't want to quit but I feel as if she is a hard one to get along with no matter what I do. What else can I do. I have tried to look up scripture but, just don't know where to go with this? |
Answer: |
Dear Erica,
Because we are in the world, we will encounter many different types of people. Some are not always aware of how their actions affect others and as the saying goes... Hurt people, hurt people, usually in an attempt to protect and defend themselves. You may not understand why this person is the way she is, and you cannot change what this woman does or says, but you can change how you react to it. God sometimes places us into situations that are uncomfortable, or unlike any others we have experienced, in order for us to learn important lessons that can not only help us, but can be used to help others too. Our interaction with difficult people can reveal things within ourselves that God wants us to see. If we approach it from a spiritual viewpoint, we might see how experiences such as this one, can help us become more patient, forgiving and loving. There are no coincidences as all things happen for a reason as part of God’s plan for us. He may have placed you in this particular job for a reason that goes beyond earning a living or establishing a career. What if… He led you to where you are now, so that you could reach out to this very woman, and be a friend to her, with no expectation of self gain, but with only the hope that she too finds what you already have… Jesus. We are called upon to follow the example of Jesus, who was without sin and lived a perfect life, and yet was insulted, persecuted, tortured and then put to death by those who hated Him. Bless those who persecute you, forgive them, pray for them and in doing so you show them the Love of Christ which can lead them to find truth and healing. It is not always easy to do so, but look at all that our Lord endured for us. If you fear for your personal safety around this person, it is best to make your employers aware of this and let them handle it. As always, pray more about this and let the Holy Spirit guide your words and deeds. |
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| mathgeek asks... |
8/3/2008 10:28:52 PM |
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Dear Gabby: |
i have two questions. i hope thats ok. my frist question is that my best friend in the whole world is fadeing away from me. i told him how i feel but i dont know if he is making any effort on rebuilding our relationship. what should i do?
my next question is when i feel down at school, how can i be honest to those who i know cares about me and i know is ready to help me. this especailly happens in the moring. i often lie about how i truly feel. what should i do? thanks |
Answer: |
Dear mathgeek,
If you have reached out for your friend and expressed how you feel about the friendship and the direction it is heading, you may need to give it some time for your friend to think on what you shared and when he is ready to respond, he will do so. Let him know you care and that you are there for him and then be patient. Trust in God’s will for your friendship with this person, and know that no matter what the outcome is, God’s plan is always better anything we can wish for ourselves. As to your second question, you have to ask yourself why you feel the need to lie about how you truly feel to those you care about. What is keeping you from opening up to them? Don’t let fear of other’s reactions to your true feelings, keep you from sharing openly and honestly, as true friends will not judge you or think differently about you for doing so. Loved ones are blessings from God, and He has placed them in our lives to help support and encourage us. So don’t deny yourself the help that you want and need, and don’t deny those who care about you, the opportunity to be what God intended them to be in your life, by withholding your real feelings from them. Pray more about both these situations. God bless you |
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| Danielle asks... |
7/30/2008 10:49:43 AM |
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Dear Gabby: |
How do you over come depression with the word of God. |
Answer: |
Dear Danielle,
There are different types of depression, and some may need to seek counselling and medical care for their depression depending on the cause and severity. But no matter what the root cause of the depression is, everyone who struggles with this can use the Word of God to help them through it, and in a lot of cases, overcome it. After all, our Lord is the Great Physician Please check out this awesome study on Depression and ways to break free of it using God's Truth. http://www.christianityoasis.com/Keyword/Depression.htm |
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| edlynne asks... |
7/20/2008 11:21:49 PM |
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Dear Gabby: |
well i am going to a new school and i don't know how to make friends and i'm afraid that people won't like me there. |
Answer: |
Dear edlynne,
Thank you for your letter. The best way to make a friend is to be a friend. Even though you may think that you are the only one concerned about this, there will be many others at your new school who will be feeling this way too. Instead of worrying about whether or not people will want to be your friend, reach out for those that you will encounter, who might need a friend too as this is what our Lord has called us to do. And when you put God first in your life, all the other things will fall into place. Don’t forget that you already have a very special friend and comforter, who will always be at your side anytime you need Him and is patiently waiting for you to spend time with Him. I speak of the Holy Spirit of God, and if you want to find out how you can get to know Him better and learn a lil bit more about who He is, check out this study:http://www.christianityoasis.com/TempleHolySpirit/default.htm
As always, pray more about this. |
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| female asks... |
7/5/2008 4:55:40 PM |
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Dear Gabby: |
I just wanted to tell you thank you for saying PRO GODS CHOICE. If only everyone believed that way. Im am not innocent and I pray for forgiveness, being unable to provide for a child I hope and pray God understands. |
Answer: |
Amen ... God is looking for ways to get us INTO Heaven, not ways to keep us out. That is why He gave His only Son for us to be able to receive GRACE by the Blood of JESUS.
God's will ... Be done. |
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| Sis in Christ asks... |
7/4/2008 12:26:53 PM |
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Dear Gabby: |
Hi, I've been reading through all of the questions b/c I really enjoy seeing how you go about answering them. I seem to get a lot of questions myself from confused Christians and I enjoy seeing how you go about answering some of the questions I do. However, when I ran across the question about abortion (from GetMyJesusOn back in 10/05), I immediately thought to myself "No... every child is a gift from God and He has a purpose for everyone...He can make good out of any bad situation." So I was very suprised when you said (basically) that King David had an affair and God killed the child, so therefore the reader should seek God's will as to whether or not they should abort. Is that basically what you said or did I translate it wrong? I'm genuinly curious, b/c so many people say they're pro-choice "b/c what if someone gets raped, etc." and I always thought as Christians we were to believe God is in control and if He allows someone to get pregnant, regardless of their situation, He has a purpose for that child (even if it's adoption) so an abortion is completely out of the question. Please help me better understand. Especially if I am wrong, b/c I truly want to have the accurate answer to this very common question. Thanks!:) <>< Your sis in Christ |
Answer: |
Greetings Sis in Christ ... I am glad that you chose to share your thoughts in this forum. Thank you for the righteous manner in which you shared your thoughts and concerns as well.
For those who are not familiar with this issue ... It is an ongoing debate in this world as to whether an unborn child should have the right to LIFE and the Mother to be, should be forced to have the child which is called Pro-Life OR whether the woman or child in many cases, as some souls that get pregnant are but children themselves that made poor choices or had even been raped, should have the choice to have the unborn child, which is called Pro-Choice.
The Pro-Life versus Pro-choice issue is a VERY sensitive one and for good reason ... There are LIVES at stake. I say "Lives" because the unborn child has a life and so does the Mother to be, which is a child of God herself.
Even potential presidential candidates are forced to make a CHOICE on this most difficult issue and it has been the reason many have not been elected over the years, because of their beliefs, one way or the other.
Sooooooo, there is NO WAY everyone will read my words today and say "Oh wow, I get it" and everyone suddenly be in harmony on this issue, so I seek not to attempt to do this, but rather to point out ONE TRUTH which is what I shared in the response in question, which was this:
As far as the abortion issue itself ... In the Bible it says that "Thou shalt not kill" and yet it also says that King David had an affair with Bathsheba who was married. She became pregnant. God killed the baby. So, it appears that to God ... It depends on the situation.
The reason I shared these words was ... Most that are Pro-Life use the commandment "Thou shall not kill" to try and condemn those who have become pregnant and choose to abort for various reasons such as being raped by some serial rapist to being 12 years old and making a poor choice, having this child become a MOM at age 13.
My point was that tho God Himself said "Thou shalt not Kill" ... God Himself has ordered many to be killed by man, such as when He once asked King Saul to kill ALL the people that Saul went to war with, but Saul did not kill one man and a prophet of God came in and killed the man for GOD and Saul was no longer in God's favor.
In the example I gave to the one who posted here ... God Himself killed a child that was NOT TO BE as the child was conceived in sin when Bathsheba who was married conceived a child by King David who was NOT her husband.
Therefore, GOD is the ONLY judge of such matters and mankind can run around and have all the debates they like and show images of an unborn child in the womb to demonstrate their position and hold rallies and demonstrations all over the world, but that will NEVER change the TRUTH that ONLY God can judge such a matter.
This is why I shared the following afterward ...
Now I will answer your question. This is what "I would do" ... Pray and ask God to deal with it. Ask God in private (Matthew 6:6) what you should do and speak of this to nobody. Ask Him to take this burden from your mind and heart and to deal with it as HE sees fit. He KNOWS the truth of this matter. IF it is not His will for YOU to be responsible for this child, HE will cause change in the way HE knows is best for YOU. God works in mysterious ways.
Check this out ... In the Bible, our Lord was tempted yet again by the Pharisees when they asked Him a question about the LAW ...
Matthew 19:3 ... The Pharisees also came unto him, tempting him, and saying unto him, Is it lawful for a man to put away his wife for every cause?
Jesus Answered them ...
Matthew 19:4-6 ... Have ye not read, that he which made them at the beginning made them male and female, And said, For this cause shall a man leave father and mother, and shall cleave to his wife: and they twain shall be one flesh? Wherefore they are no more twain, but one flesh. What therefore God hath joined together, let not man put asunder.
The Pharisees questioned His response ...
Matthew 19:7 ... Why did Moses then command to give a writing of divorcement, and to put her away?
Jesus responded ...
Matthew 19:8-9 ... Moses because of the hardness of your hearts suffered you to put away your wives: but from the beginning it was not so. And I say unto you, Whosoever shall put away his wife, except it be for fornication, and shall marry another, committeth adultery: and whoso marrieth her which is put away doth commit adultery.
This caused concern with His disciples and they said to Jesus:
Matthew 19:10 ... If the case of the man be so with his wife, it is not good to marry.
Then Jesus said something that we all need to HEAR and UNDERSTAND ...
Matthew 19:11 ... All men cannot receive this saying, save they to whom it is given.
In other words ... All Laws do not apply to all people, all of the time.
I do not expect to change anyone's views, in TRUTH I am not sure where I would stand in the event that I was forced to say ONE WAY OR THE OTHER as I believe that NO one policy or Law can be enforced on every situation.
No, I seek only to give those who can hear, the CHOICE to allow GOD to determine what is right and wrong in each INDIVIDUAL case and not try and implement a ONE SIZE FITS ALL law and convict a soul that God may find innocent by His own reasoning.
I hope this has explained the words I shared and enlightened some to the TRUTH ...
Only GOD knows the heart of man and only He can judge such matters.
So I am ... PRO-GOD's Choice
Luv all of ya
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| Courtney asks... |
4/19/2008 12:51:45 PM |
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Dear Gabby: |
I'm going to high school in a few months, and im kinda worried about making the right friends... how can i find good christian people to hang out with? |
Answer: |
Dear courtney, You sound like a very sensible young lady who knows how important it is to surround yourself with people who are following Jesus and living their life for Him instead of trying to fit in with the world. If there are no Christian youth groups at your high school, this may be a great opportunity for you to start one. You can also come into the Oasis chatrooms and forums, where you can meet and fellowship with many other Christian teens and participate in awesome Christian Teen Programs that will help you grow in the Lord. Remember also, that even if someone isnt a Christian, it doesnt mean you shouldnt befriend them, as you can be a witness to them of Christ's love and truth and lead them to Jesus. The Bible tells us that we are in the world, not of it. Although we may be surrounded by worldly things and people, we do not belong to the world and should not become influenced and enticed by worldly things, but must remain firmly rooted in Jesus and shine our lights for those who are in the darkness. Represent Him to all you come in contact with. To find how you can Represent Jesus, please check out the My Brother's Keeper Program: http://www.christianityoasis.com/MyBrothersKeeper/Forum.htm Pray about this and always let the Holy Spirit guide your words and deeds. |
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| Ginger asks... |
4/10/2008 11:28:56 AM |
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Dear Gabby: |
How do I choose between being bisexual and being a christian? |
Answer: |
Dear Ginger, Thank you for writing in. Many teens, and adults alike will reach a point where they feel that they are being pulled in two different directions. One road leads to Jesus, and the other is so very tempting in that it offers them what they feel will make them happy here on earth. How do you choose? We must look at it thru our spiritual eyes instead of our worldly ones. Jesus is the only way for salvation and eternal life. Nothing or no one here on earth can gain us entry into heaven except Jesus Christ. He is THE WAY. For this very reason, we must be prepared to choose Him over all else, even tho the other paths may be so very appealing to us. Christians are in no way perfect human beings. We make mistakes, we sin, we have trials and tribulations in our lives, addictions and other problems that we struggle with. This does not mean that we do not love Jesus or are not worthy of following Him. He knows we fall short,that is why He gave His life for us.He accepts and loves us, in spite of our imperfections, and promises us that if we seek His will in our lives, He will help us to overcome those things that we are struggling with, and bring peace to our hearts. The choice is simple. Eternal life thru Jesus... or all the other paths that offer only temporal happiness and pleasures, which will fade away along with the rest of the things of the world. Please pray lots about this and check out the following study, which will help bring understanding on this matter: http://www.christianityoasis.com/Keyword/Homosexuality.htm
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| kelly asks... |
3/27/2008 5:51:41 PM |
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Dear Gabby: |
dear Gabby thank you very much for your advice.
I have another question i hope i dont anoy you but i have a firend and she is very humble she's
everything i think a christian should be i have always been telling myself that i want to be like her (in character) but is it o.k. for me to ask God to make me to be like her, Because i have been Baptised for at least four years but i do not see where my christian life has improved since then, is it o.k. for me to say that i been a Christian since six years old but baptised when i was about 13 |
Answer: |
Dear kelly, I appreciate you writing in and you would never annoy me :) It is wonderful to have Christian role models, whose words and deeds inspire us to live more righteously. It is fine for you to want to have similar qualities as your friend, but if you are going to ask God to make you more like anyone, then you should ask Him to help you become more like our Lord Jesus Christ, as He is the only example of a perfect, holy and sinless life. Though role models give us inspiration and encouragement, it is Him that we are to strive to emulate in every aspect of our lives.We become a Christian when we accept Jesus into our hearts and lives, as our Lord and Savior. Water baptism represents a physical symbol of washing away our sins. It matters little how long one has been water baptised, or even if they are water baptised, for accepting Jesus brings the true baptism, the baptism of the Holy Spirit. What matters is that you choose Jesus, and dedicate your life to following Him and doing the will of God. THAT is what makes you a Christian. As always, pray lots about this. |
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| kelly asks... |
3/25/2008 11:51:13 PM |
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Dear Gabby: |
dear gabby it's my first time talking 2 u, i notice that when i go to church on sundays i feel motivated and happy but during the week i am not so close to God anymore, i feel like a complete trash, what do u think is causing this? i am also worried about going to college i am afraid of not fitting in with everybody else because i am so small,help me sort this out please, thank you
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Answer: |
Dear Kelly,
Thank you for writing in. A lot of Christians seem to think that just a few hours on a Sunday at church is enough spiritual nourishment for their souls, until the next Sunday rolls around. As you have found out, this is just not so. The Bible tells us that if we put God first, all the rest will fall into place: Matthew 6:33 ‘But seek ye first the kingdom of God, and his righteousness; and all these things shall be added unto you’. When we don’t have a strong relationship with God, other aspects of our lives begin to suffer. Our relationship with God is far more important than any earthly relationship, but sadly, most times it is the one we spend the least amount of time on. The answer is simple: The more time you devote to God, by way of prayer, reading the Bible, communing with the Holy Spirit, Bible studies etc. the stronger your relationship with Him will be. So give more of your time to the Lord and watch the difference it makes in your life, as opposed to a couple hours one day a week. As far as not fitting in with everyone else at school, Why would you want to? Fitting in usually means following all the popular worldly trends that so many others become slaves to. You are unique. God made you different from everyone else and He made you in His image. What you look like on the outside does not change who you are on the inside, and if you have Jesus within you, all things are possible. So don’t be afraid to be YOU. Start a new trend... Don’t be concerned with what other people think of you, but seek to please God first and be proud of who He made you to be instead of trying to become what the world wants you to be. Pray more about this and check out this wonderful study that will help you to better understand who God wants you to be: http://www.christianityoasis.com/Keyword/WhoAmI.htm
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| Worried asks... |
3/25/2008 2:23:39 PM |
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Dear Gabby: |
Hi Gabby my whole life I have wanted to be a professional athlete of some sort and I read the study called Follow Me a couple days ago and now I am wondering what I should do? |
Answer: |
Dear Worried,
Man makes many plans, but it is the Will of God that will prevail. It may very well be that becoming a professional athlete is part of God’s plan for your life, but there is only one way to know for sure. Following Jesus means placing His Will above our own, so pray and ask Him to reveal to you what His Will is, and then you will find peace in your decision. Whether you continue to pursue becoming a professional athlete, or head out in a whole new direction, with God leading you, you have nothing to fear. If you want to find out if you are called to serve God and how you can go about doing so, please check out the My Brother’s Keeper Program: http://www.christianityoasis.com/MyBrothersKeeper/Forum.htm
Pray lots about this and seek to find what God’s will is for your life. |
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| Ycart asks... |
3/10/2008 2:42:14 PM |
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Dear Gabby: |
Hey again.Ummmm are we allowed to write in the Bibles. like make notes and hightlight and write? |
Answer: |
Hi again dear friend. The Bible is the Word of God, given to us so that we can learn more about Him and His plans for us. Taking time to study the Bible, as opposed to just reading through it, is very important to order to understand the depths of the words within it. If you wish to jot down little notes that help explain certain words or scriptures, and highlight certain parts of it that stand out to you, there is nothing wrong with doing so, as it is an effective way of learning, understanding and remembering what has been read. Look at it this way ... Righteous works for God can not contend with God. As always, be sure to pray about this. |
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| Ycart asks... |
2/25/2008 9:08:02 PM |
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Dear Gabby: |
hey its me again after some time huh? yea. well today was an okay day i guess. umm i mean no offence by this question it just came to me. when like we do something wrong and we know it and then something wrong happens in our lifes like we get sick or just everything goes wrong is it a fact to say its God punishing us? or not? what i mean is does God punish us? oh i remember another question: should we fear God? umm also i was wondering if God still prays for us? or is it like my friend says "Who does he pray to if He's God?" right ? maybe that question isn't good.is there a paradise and a heaven? umm okay this is teen stuff i guess. i should concentrate in school right and not let boys get to me? cuz ther's these boys who are saying things about me that are lies and at first it made me mad. then i thought that that just fills my heart with unneccesary hate and anger so i should just disregard it right? okay so another story. umm i've never ever had a boyfriend. but before i was good i used to make it seem like i did by like acting suspicious and stuff. but i was just messing around. so my Christian grandma says that i shouldn't have a boyfriend cuz its bad and wrong and she doesn't believe me when i tell her that i don't. i kindda deserve not being believed right? well i'm being honest. i even told her God knows i'm not lying but she said i shouldn't involve Him in my lying. so she doesn't believe me. what should i do? do i just keep it as is knowing that God and I know its true and thats the most important? wow that sounds right. its the second time i type this cuz i accidently cleared it the first time so that answered myself huh. still tell me. ummm can you also pray for me cuz i've been having bad thoughts about when i grow up and leaving my family behind me and starting somewhere else. i don't want that. i want to save my family and be with them. I think Dear Gabby is a blessing . thank you |
Answer: |
Dear Ycart,
You have many awesome questions that show your enthusiasm and passion to learn more about God. I want to send you to a place where you can not only get the answers to the questions you have now, but you will also learn many more interesting and wonderful Truths about God that you may not have known before. Check out our Christian Walk Studies page: http://www.christianityoasis.com/Keyword/CoolChristianStudies.htm
It’s tough when people say things about us that aren’t true, and it hurts us, but Jesus asks us to forgive them, as He has forgiven us of our wrong doings, and to not harbour hatred against them, but to love them and do good unto them instead. Luke 6:27-28 ‘But I say unto you which hear, Love your enemies, do good to them which hate you, Bless them that curse you, and pray for them which despitefully use you.’By your choosing to forgive and forget and not retaliate in anger, you are truly reflecting the Love of Christ to others. If you are being honest about something, and others do not believe you, then leave it in God’s hands. Trust that He knows the heart of all matters, and will reveal the Truth in His time, and don’t let this distract you from your calling to serve God. Keep your eyes, and your thoughts on Jesus, and ask the Holy Spirit to lead you into God’s will in all matters. Pray more about this and know that I am praying for you too. GBU. |
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| Rebekah asks... |
2/18/2008 11:06:27 PM |
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Dear Gabby: |
hi I wnat to get babtized but am afraid my mom will expect more from me. what should I do? |
Answer: |
Dear Rebekah,
What about what Jesus expects from you? Are you doing what He asks of you? Being baptized is a physical symbol of washing away one's sins, but when you accept Jesus into your heart as your Lord and Saviour and become a Christian, you are now a follower of Christ, and there are things that God expects from you. John 12:25-26 He that loveth his life shall lose it; and he that hateth his life in this world shall keep it unto life eternal.If any man serve me, let him follow me; and where I am, there shall also my servant be: if any man serve me, him will my Father honour. Jesus asks us to pick up our crosses and follow Him. Mark 8:34 And when he had called the people unto him with his disciples also, he said unto them, Whosoever will come after me, let him deny himself, and take up his cross, and follow me. Find out what Jesus expects of you by getting to know Him through reading the Bible and prayer. Get to know Jesus and what He has done and continues to do for you, and you will find yourself wanting to do what He asks of you out of Love for Him. John 14:23-24 Jesus answered and said unto him, If a man love me, he will keep my words: and my Father will love him, and we will come unto him, and make our abode with him.He that loveth me not keepeth not my sayings: and the word which ye hear is not mine, but the Father's which sent me.Pray more about this and check out this study that will help you better understand what it means to be a follower of Jesus: http://www.christianityoasis.com/Keyword/FollowMe.htm
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| silver2001 asks... |
2/15/2008 9:10:28 AM |
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Dear Gabby: |
I just became christian 2 months ago, and i'm scared if i hop religions again like in the past. i move religions cuz' something in one religion gets boring and i don't want to hear it at the time, what should i do to stop this cycle? |
Answer: |
Dear silver, thank you for your letter. You need to ask yourself if you are ready to find the Truth. There are many religions out there, but Jesus tells us that there is only one path to God, and that is through Him. John 14:6 'Jesus saith unto him, I am the way, the truth, and the life: no man cometh unto the Father, but by me'. The reason why you may have gone from religion to religion in the past, was perhaps not cuz they were boring, but maybe cuz you did not feel Truth within their beliefs and teachings. God has brought you to this point. He has led you to Christianity and to Jesus, and this is your chance to find out for yourself if this is the Truth. And when you find the Truth, it shall set you free, and you will no longer feel the need to keep searching. Seek to find Truth. Where your soul will spend Eternity is at stake. Pray lots about this. |
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| Ycart asks... |
2/14/2008 10:31:18 PM |
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Dear Gabby: |
Thank you again Gabby for ur advice. Well its valentines day today and i wrote a card to some of my teachers. Is it not appropiate to tell them to trust in God in the card? I like wrote that they were great teachers but one of my teachers shared a personal problem with us a while back and i could tell he was letting it bring him down and he was ashamed cuz well now he has to use a hearing aid. so i wrote that he shouldn't let that bring him down cuz God is always with him and with him all things are possible. but then on the card i also put hat i was sorry if what i wrote sounded dumb but then i regreted that cuz it was like doubting myself on my belief of God. But its not wrong is it? to tell him to trust in God. I mean he has admitted that there's a God out there . |
Answer: |
Hello again dear friend. Do not worry about what others consider to be appropriate, but instead follow your heart and seize every opportunity you find to share God with others. Jesus tells us that if we confess Him before men, He will confess us before His Father:
Matthew 10: 32-33 Whosoever therefore shall confess me before men, him will I confess also before my Father which is in heaven. But whosoever shall deny me before men, him will I also deny before my Father which is in heaven. Which is more important? What God thinks? Or what other people consider appropriate? Dont let fear of what others will say or think silence what you know to be Truth. Stand up tall and proud and Represent Jesus in all you do and say, and in so doing, be a light that will lead those who are lost and in the dark, back home to God.We have an awesome program for teens who feel they are Called by God to serve Him, which will help you find out what your spiritual gifts are and show you how to use these gifts to Represent Jesus and glorify God. Have you checked out the My Brothers Keeper Program yet:
http://www.christianityoasis.com/MyBrothersKeeper/Forum.htm
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| Ycart asks... |
2/10/2008 10:59:50 PM |
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Dear Gabby: |
Dear Gabby, thank you for your past answer. I just read your reply today. My very good Christian friend is coming over to my house more often and a couple of days ago when she left my house my mom asked me something. She well stated that I was getting realy close to my friends religion and i said i was.She then asked why. At first, i truly panicked. It was the chance to tell them what it was all like. I told her it was nothing alike the church we went to. I told her that you feel so much more joy and peace and closer to God. She didn't really say anything back and I don't think i said the right things. At school I'm joining a youth alive club. Should i feel ashamed because i don't know certain things? I mean today i went to church with my Christian friend and I had to ask her what the difference was between the old testiment and the new testiment. Then i asked her when can we say God Bless You. And then i asked if God and Jesus was the same person. And i don't know how to well look for passages in the Bible. It takes me a while to breath and actually ask the question. I know it's the only way i'll learn but should i care of what others think?Of how much i'm totally late in knowing? |
Answer: |
Dear Ycart,
Good to hear from you again. It is awesome that you are getting involved in activities that will help you learn and grow in the Lord. Never feel ashamed about seeking to find the answer to things that you are unsure about. Jesus Himself told us to Ask, Seek and Knock: Matthew 7:7-8 Ask, and it shall be given you; seek, and ye shall find; knock, and it shall be opened unto you: For every one that asketh receiveth; and he that seeketh findeth; and to him that knocketh it shall be opened. Don’t let worry and fear about what others will think or say, keep you from seeking to find the answers to your questions, as the Truths that you discover, will not only bring peace to your heart, but will also help enlighten others who do not know about God, as you are doing now with your mom. Do you know that by simply sharing how you felt with your mom, you have actually planted seeds within her, that may someday grow and blossom? Be patient and don’t get discouraged, but continue to plant those seeds of Truth by way of your words and deeds. That is what we are called to do, and it is God who will make them grow: 1 Cor 3:6-7 I have planted, Apollos watered; but God gave the increase. So then neither is he that planteth any thing, neither he that watereth; but God that giveth the increase. Check out this awesome study, that will help you to understand more about Jesus: Gospel of Jesus Christ http://www.christianityoasis.com/TellMeTheStoryOfJesus/Forum.htm
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| kearstin asks... |
2/7/2008 7:15:00 PM |
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Dear Gabby: |
HELP!!i have a friend who needs help bigtime. her dad beats her and her mom yells at her all the time. she is going to run away to my house. if she can't she'll kill herself. i don't know what to do. shes tried calling the people who are suppost to help, but her parents won't go to the door and she will surely kill herself if she is living with people she doesn't know. please help me, this is very urgent, she runs away tomarrow. |
Answer: |
Dear Kearstin ... We are unable to give much advice on this, other than to say that it is best for her to contact the authorities or for you to do so for her as to discover what can be done to resolve this issue. Pray about this and may God's will be done.
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| Ycart asks... |
1/30/2008 10:54:57 PM |
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Dear Gabby: |
Well, i was baptized two summers ago along with my sisters in another state. We had gone to spend the summer with my Christian family memebers there and my sisters and I, so I thought loved it. I loved going to church and feeling a part of joy and love and feeling close to God more u know? Our aunt told us it would be very hard when we came back because our parents weren't Christians. I can't complain cuz we were warned. My sisters fell back into the worldly ways not even a week from our return. It was very hard for me to keep going when I felt so alone. Now the present I haven't gone to church in a while. One of my friends invites me to hers once in a while and i'm thankful for that because it gives me an excuse to tell my parents if i can go to church. I recently started praying again. The good praying that makes me feel good i guess. My mom got sick a couple of weeks ago and she asked my sister and me to pray for her something she never does. I feel that she truly believes in God's power but other times it seems she just has no hope. I want to talk to her more about what God can do and what prayer can do when you yourself pray, but i don't know how to bring out the subject. I don't know where to start. I feel like if i tell them they'll think i'm just not adult enough to know what i'm talking about and not take me seriously. How should I tell them? Should I tell them at all? |
Answer: |
Dear Ycart,
What if you are the one that God has chosen to lead your parents to Jesus? Don’t let fear about what they would think and whether or not they would take you seriously, keep you from having what may be THE most important conversation you may ever have with your parents. This is about where their souls will spend eternity. This is definitely a conversation worth having, and could change your parents’ life forever. Even if they do not immediately choose to become Christians, you would have planted seeds of Truth within them, that over time could grow and blossom. God has placed it on your heart to share the love of Jesus with them and He will not forsake you. Pray and ask the Holy Spirit to give you the words to reach your parents, and then follow His guidance. Let Him speak through you. Luke 12:11-12 ‘And when they bring you unto the synagogues, and unto magistrates, and powers, take ye no thought how or what thing ye shall answer, or what ye shall say:For the Holy Ghost shall teach you in the same hour what ye ought to say.’ Do not let fears that you are too young, keep you from sharing God’s word with others. The prophet Jeremiah was but a child when he was called by God to be a prophet to the nations. Jeremiah had the same concerns and said to God: ‘Ah, Lord GOD! behold, I cannot speak: for I am a child’. And God said to Jeremiah: ‘Say not, I am a child: for thou shalt go to all that I shall send thee, and whatsoever I command thee thou shalt speak. Be not afraid of their faces: for I am with thee to deliver thee, saith the LORD.’ And then God put out His hand and touched Jeremiah’s mouth and said to him: ‘Behold, I have put my words in thy mouth.’ In the same way, the Holy Spirit of God will give you the words to reach those that God has called you to witness too. Pray lots about this, and check out this awesome study that will help bring understanding and peace to your mind and heart: http://www.christianityoasis.com/Keyword/YoungAtHeart.htm |
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| Joleen McCormack asks... |
1/30/2008 5:25:13 PM |
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Dear Gabby: |
What should I do when I like somebody, then see something I didn't want to see, (as in a video) and they accuse me of waisting their time, when I am about to tell them. (The person that was in the video). What do I do when I want to tell the guy what happened, and that I like him?? Help! I'm scared! |
Answer: |
Dear Joleen,
No matter what the situation, honesty is always the best choice. Let this person know that you are seeking his best interest by letting him know the truth and not trying to hurt him or waste his time. If he is truly your friend, he will understand and appreciate your being upfront and honest about the situation. If you know of something that is potentially harmful to yourself, your friend, or someone else, make sure you let your parents or guardian know, so that they can take steps to ensure that no one gets hurt. Pray more about this and ask the Holy Spirit to guide your words and deeds. |
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| Madisen asks... |
1/30/2008 5:22:12 PM |
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Dear Gabby: |
What should i do when everyone else at school is doing the wrong thing and influencing me to do the wrong thing as well? |
Answer: |
Dear Madisen,
When people encourage you to do the wrong things, they can make it seem quite exciting and try to convince you that it's the "cool" thing to do. But what they will never tell you are the consequences of these actions. Just look around and you will see the results of the choices to do wrong. From broken hearts to suicide. We all have a choice to do the right thing, or the wrong thing, and if we choose to do what we know in our heart is not right, not only will we be held accountable for our actions here on earth, but with our heavenly Father as well.
James 4:4 Therefore to him that knoweth how to do good and doeth it not, to him it is sin.
We will encounter many people in our lives who will try to get us to follow down the path that they are on,but only one path leads to Jesus and eternal life. Make sure that this is the one you stay on by making the choice to do what our Lord Jesus would want you to do. It is better to be considered uncool by others than to risk being led astray and away from Jesus. Always ask yourself WWJD - What would Jesus do? and then let the Holy Spirit help you to make the right decisions for Jesus. Real friends will respect your choice to do the right thing as they will truly care for your safety and well being, and you may even start a new trend and inspire others to make righteous choices as well. Pray more about this and check out this awesome program for those who want to follow Jesus instead of the world: http://www.christianityoasis.com/ChildOfGod/Forum.htm |
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| Rebekah asks... |
1/28/2008 4:26:04 PM |
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Dear Gabby: |
There is this boy i like at worship. I do not know if he likes he. How would I approach him. Also how would I go about getting a boyfriend |
Answer: |
Dear Rebekah,
Thank you for your letter. Now, you can go out and get a boyfriend, like most others choose to do because they are feeling lonely or because they want to fit in with those around them, OR, you can choose wait for your soul mate. Remember you don’t just want ANY person to share your life with, you want The One. Your soul mate that God has picked out for you, and when God feels like you are ready, He will bring you two together at just the right time. Don’t jeopardize your relationship with the one God has chosen for you, by rushing into a relationship just to be in a relationship. It will only bring you heartache and pain in the long run, as anything that is not God’s Will usually does. The foundation of any strong relationship is built on friendship and trust, and of course, God. So get to know others as friends first, and if it is God’s will for a friendship to grow into something more later on, it will happen. But don’t be impatient, take your time, and wait for God to reveal your soul mate to you. Put God first, and all the rest will fall into place: Psalms 37: 4-5 Delight thyself also in the LORD; and he shall give thee the desires of thine heart. Commit thy way unto the LORD; trust also in him; and he shall bring it to pass. So don’t allow anyone or anything to distract you from your First Love, Jesus. Use the time that you have now to build a strong relationship with God, and find out His will for your life. Pray more about this and check out the My Brother’s Keeper Program for teens, which will help you find out how you can use your spiritual gifts and talents to serve and bring glory to God : http://www.christianityoasis.com/MyBrothersKeeper/Forum.htm
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| Jordan Stoakes asks... |
1/26/2008 2:22:52 PM |
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Dear Gabby: |
Dear Gabby,
My parents and my brother aren't into God the way i am and i am afraid that they will not be saved when their time comes. What should i do? |
Answer: |
Dear Jordan,
Jesus told us this parable: Matt 5:14-16 ‘You are the light of the world. A city built on a hilltop cannot be hidden. No one lights a lamp to put it under a tub; they put it on a lamp-stand where it shines for everyone in the house. In the same way your light must shine in the sight of men, so that seeing your good works, they may give praise to your Father in heaven.'
Now we cannot force anyone to accept and follow Jesus, as we all have to make that choice for ourselves. But we who know Him, can go out and shine His light so that those in the dark will see and be led to Him. Have you tried talking to your family about how you feel and your fears that they will not be saved? I know that sharing Jesus with our loved ones isn’t always easy, but you can try bringing Jesus into your home in different ways that include your family. For example, you can try suggesting a Bible Board Game or Trivia Game, or perhaps renting a great Christian movie and having a movie night, doing a Bible study, or even sharing your favorite Christian music with them. These activities can open up discussions and give you the opportunity to talk to your family about how you feel. There are many ways to share Jesus with others, however, you must not get discouraged if those around you don’t immediately want to change their ways and come to Christ. Just continue to plant seeds of truth by way of your words and deeds. Let your life be an example of Jesus’ love so that those around you will want to have that peace and joy that they see in you. Don’t give up, cuz we know that the time is short, and those of us who are in the light must do all we can to bring God’s lost children back to Him. Look at the examples of perseverance and dedication set by the apostles and those saints who went before us, and remember that we must keep trying to spread the truth of Jesus with as many as we can. I have an awesome program for you, which will teach you how to use the spiritual gifts and talents that God gave you, to go out into the world and become what Jesus has called us to be… Fishers of Men. Check out the My Brother’s Keeper Program: http://www.christianityoasis.com/MyBrothersKeeper/Forum.htm
Pray more about this and keep shining that light for Jesus . |
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| Chelsea asks... |
12/20/2007 1:16:54 PM |
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Dear Gabby: |
I don't know what to do...My parents are very good christians and they are pastors too. but they get on my case about my weight. I am 125 and my mom freaked out. I have now become anorexic and I dunno... |
Answer: |
Dear Chelsea, Thank you for your letter. Too many people these days are concerned with what is on the outside, instead of looking within. Cuz that is who we truly are you know. The body is just a shell that houses our soul and spirit, and it is susceptible to age, diseases and other factors that will cause it to deteriorate over time. It is not eternal,but our souls are. Most people give thought and time to make sure their bodies look good, while totally disregarding the condition of their soul, when the soul is what will live on when the body dies.. God makes it clear what He looks at and what matters to Him.
1Sam 16:7 ' for the LORD seeth not as man seeth; for man looketh on the outward appearance, but the LORD looketh on the heart.'
Do not let anyone make you feel as if you are less of a person because you do not look like the emaciated models on the covers of many magazines these days. Your body is your temple, and yes, you should take care of it so that it will serve you well while u serve the Lord here on earth. But God has made you unique. There is only one Chelsea. He does not want you to try to live up to any man made standards to look like someone else. What other people say and think about us, does not define who we are, as most will judge what is on the exterior. Look within and know that you are a Child of God.You are made in His image and He wants you to be who He created you to be.Not try to conform to who the world wants you to be. Pray more about this.
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| nikki asks... |
11/30/2007 10:35:58 AM |
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Dear Gabby: |
dear gabby,
i've been going through alot of hard times since my loved ones died. My mom and brother died in a car wreck in 2003 and my grandfather died when i was one that was in 1991. I miss them and im still going through the grieving stages i thought i would be done going through them but i'm stuck in the grieving stages. please give me some advice on how to move on. |
Answer: |
Dear Nikki ... Most will say during these times that they know just how you feel, when they truly have no clue unless they have experienced such loss. However, I have been there and DO know what you are feeling as I lost those most dear to me as well. I was finally able to conquer the lonely, cold, empty feeling within by asking myself a simple question and I would like to ask it of you ... IF you could hear what your loved ones were saying to you right now, what do you imagine it would be that they would say? Would they say "yes, that's right girl .... Waste your life mourning for us." Or would they say "We love you and we want you to be happy and carry on" ... See, we both know our loved ones would not want us to be holding these horrible feelings but rather out there living for something.
Another thing that made me see TRUTH and gave me the ability to find that peace within was knowing ... Where my loved ones were.
Check out the following studies to understand more about what happens when someone dies ...
http://www.christianityoasis.com/EndTimes/FearOfDeath.htm
http://www.christianityoasis.com/Keyword/AbrahamsBosom.htm
Your lost loved ones are not DEAD in the sense of being gone forever. They have just passed from this realm to the next. So put away the sadness and do as your loved ones would want ...
It is your time to REPRESENT ...
It is your time to fight the good fight of Faith.
It is your time to live and love.
Pray lots about this and ask God to bring to mind and heart the TRUTH of this matter as to find PEACE. If you need to talk more, contact me at WebServant@ChristianityOasis.com
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| Mia asks... |
11/18/2007 7:06:10 PM |
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Dear Gabby: |
I really want my friends to come to Christ. I want to take them to a conference but i cant find one. Can you help me? I live in Chicago. |
Answer: |
Dear Mia,
That is a GREAT idea. Try going on Google and searching for Christian conferences in your area. You could also get all your friends to become members for free at www.ChristianityOasis.com and then meet in our Christian forums and Chat room and get your own youth group going ...
It's free and we have cool stuff they would like like Christian CD player, shout box, games, studies, neat programs, contests with Christian prizes and even a My C-O-O-L Space where they can make their own web site. Pray about this and God's will be done. |
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| Stefani Torres asks... |
10/23/2007 9:01:53 PM |
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Dear Gabby: |
Hi! Two sundays ago i was in a member class at church. I have only been saved for about 4 months. While one of the leaders of my church was speaking he turned to me and asked me, " are you a sophomore?" i said "yes". He said, "the holy spirit told me that". Then he said, "you have the power to save your high school". Now that came to me as shocking. I was like wow. I know i should pray about it but i dont exactly know what to pray about it. Also is there any people in the bible who had a somewhat simliar experience to mine? and is this considered a calling? |
Answer: |
Dear Stefani ... That is AWESOME news. We have a program called "Child of God" ( http://www.christianityoasis.com/ChildOfGod/Forum.htm )that you should consider checking out. It is designed to help young people who feel they have been called by God to serve Him and gives ideas on how to do so. Like you said ... Pray about this and ask for God's will to be done. |
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| caitlyn asks... |
9/27/2007 11:55:06 PM |
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Dear Gabby: |
i dont understand god at all.i dont no if god is just figure of speach or real.i want god to real so bad.how will i no.i dont fill liked or even loved by him. |
Answer: |
Dear caitlyn,
You are not alone. many have been at a point where they wanted to know whether God truly existed or not. God knew that we would have these questions, and He gives us the solution in His Word: Jeremiah 29:13 'And ye shall seek me and find me when ye shall search for me with all your heart.' How would you determine if anything is real or not? You would get all the information you can about it and then diligently go through it to determine whether you felt in your heart that this was the truth or not. The same thing applies to God. He doesnt want to force us into believing in Him. He wants us to choose to do so. And the only way we can decide if we believe He is real or not, is to learn more about Him. He has given us the Bible, which is His Word, so that we can learn about Him and then choose what we believe. This desire that you feel to know whether God is real or not is Him nudging you, tugging at your heart and inviting you to get to know Him.The best place to start is by reading the Gospel of Jesus Christ, who God sent to die on the cross for our sins because He loved us so much. The bible tells us no one can come to the Father except through Jesus Christ: John 14:6 - 'Jesus saith unto him, I am the way, the truth, and the life: no man cometh unto the Father, but by me.' So this is an great place to start. Ask God to grant you understanding of His Word as you begin this amazing journey. Then open up your heart and mind and seek Truth. He will reveal Himself to those who are seek Him with all their heart :) Check out this awesome study on the Gospel of Jesus Christ : http://www.christianityoasis.com/TellMeTheStoryOfJesus/Forum.htm . |
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| Supposedly "Saved" asks... |
8/12/2007 3:06:34 AM |
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Dear Gabby: |
I have this Christian friends, and they think they are better than me because they have been "saved" and it doesn't make sense, I mean I do somewhat believe in God, and I do pray. But, I don't get why they think I should be "saved" when they liked me BEFORE they knew I didn't go to church. I don't really know if they are my true friends. Are they? What should I do? Please help me!!! |
Answer: |
Dear Supposedly "Saved"
Thank you for your letter. Being 'saved' is a term used by those who have accepted Jesus into their hearts and lives, and are now following Him instead of the world. Jesus is referred to as our Savior, because through His dying for our sins, all mankind was given a second chance at eternal life, as He became the sacrifice for our sins. When someone accepts Jesus as their Lord and Savior, they are saved from the punishment of an eternity in hell for the sins they committed. If you have accepted Jesus as your Lord and Savior, and you are seeking a personal relationship with Him, then you are 'saved'. You stated that your friends think that you should be saved like they are. Perhaps they want for you what they have, which is a personal relationship with Jesus and the chance at eternal life. They may be so enthusiastic about wanting you to know Jesus, that they may not realize that the way by which they are doing so, is hurting your feelings and making you believe that they do not like you anymore. A good question to ask yourself is: If they didn’t care about me, would they want me to receive the gift of Salvation like they did? Honesty and communication are important ingredients in any friendship, so talk with your friends in an open, honest and loving manner, and let them know how you feel about this. Accepting Jesus and becoming 'saved' is a personal decision and commitment which can only be made by the individual themselves, and not forced upon them. Jesus wants us to come to Him willingly and He waits patiently for us to do so. Although your friends may want this for you, the decision is yours to make. Pray more about this.
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| Foolish And Confused asks... |
8/12/2007 3:01:42 AM |
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Dear Gabby: |
Well, I am starting to think I should not believe in God anymore. I mean, I have been praying for my mother, who has been leading her life into nothing but havoc, and who is also an alcoholic. I have been praying that she will come to her senses, and face all the damage that has been dome. I have prayed so much for her, and I still haven't heard from her since she last emailed me, which has been about a month. I am just starting to believe that He isn't listening to me. What should I do? I have been praying for my mom ever since I was 5 and I am 13! That is 8 years! Pleasee! Help!!! |
Answer: |
Dear Foolish And Confused
I understand how badly you want for your mom to start making better choices and decisions for her life, and this is evident from how much you have been praying for her to be able to do that. And I also understand why you are becoming discouraged, as you feel like what you have been praying for, for so long now, just isn’t happening. But this does not mean that God isn’t listening to your prayers, or that He doesn’t care about you and your mom. It can however, mean that what you have been praying for may not be God's will at this point in time. It is important to remember that when we pray and ask God for something, no matter how badly we may want it, we should always ask for His Will to be done, above ours. Jesus gave us an example of how we should pray, by asking for God's will to be done:
Matt 6:8-10: for your Father knoweth what things ye have need of, before ye ask him. After this manner therefore pray ye: Our Father which art in heaven, Hallowed be thy name. Thy kingdom come. Thy will be done in earth, as it is in heaven.
God sees the beginning and the end, we only see a small part of what is in between.He knows why He allows certain things to happen, even if we may not understand why.He has the best possible plan and purpose for each of us, and His timing is better than ours. When Jesus was in the garden of Gethsemane, he was distressed and saddened, knowing that He was going to be tortured and killed. But Jesus prayed for the will of the Father to be done: Matt 26:39: And he went a little further, and fell on his face, and prayed, saying, O my Father, if it be possible, let this cup pass from me: nevertheless not as I will, but as thou wilt. Matt 26:42: He went away again the second time, and prayed, saying, O my Father, if this cup may not pass away from me, except I drink it, thy will be done. Even knowing the pain and suffering that was to come, Jesus prayed that the Father's will be done. God had an amazing plan,that would bring salvation to mankind, but in order for us to receive it, Jesus would have to die. Because our prayers are not answered in the way we want them, doesn’t mean that God doesn’t love us or is punishing us. Because He loves us so much and wants the best for us, He may hold back from giving us what we want now, in order for us to receive something even more awesome later on. Continue to pray for your mom, and let God know that you are trusting in Him by praying for His Will to be done, above all else, in both your mom's life and in your's. For more on effective prayer, check out this study: http://www.christianityoasis.com/Keyword/EffectiveChristianPrayer.htm |
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| cunfusseled asks... |
8/8/2007 10:01:39 PM |
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Dear Gabby: |
I HAVE BEEN A CHRISTIAN SINCE I WAS 8 AND I NEVER QUESTIONED GOD UNTIL A COUPLE OF MOUNTHS AGO. I WAS SAYIN MY NORMAL PRAYERS AND THEN I STARTED WONDERING IF GOD EVEN EXIST AND AT THAT MOMENT I COULDNT FEEL HIM LIKE BEFORE I'V WENT THROUGH FOUR MONTHES OF PAINFULL DOUBTS AND FEAR AND IM SCARED WHAT IF THERE ISN'T A GOD AND HOW WILL I COMPLETELY GET BETTER AND THE REALLY SAD THING IS IV ASKED FOR SIGHN AND GOT THEM BUT I STILL WONDER AND DONT FEEL GOD LIKE I DID BEFORE SO COULD YOU PLEASE HELP ME THANXS |
Answer: |
First of all, let’s look at what you wrote in your letter: I WAS SAYIN MY NORMAL PRAYERS AND THEN I STARTED WONDERING IF GOD EVEN EXIST AND AT THAT MOMENT I COULDNT FEEL HIM LIKE BEFORE. You grew up believing in God and praying to Him and you were able to feel Him because of your faith in Him. But, when you began to doubt that He existed, at that moment you couldn't feel Him anymore. It is not because He doesn't exist that you don’t feel Him anymore. It is because your doubts and fears are blocking you from feeling Him. There is a great story in the Bible that shows us what happens when we allow doubts and fears to affect our faith.
Matt 14:22-31 "And straightway Jesus constrained his disciples to get into a ship, and to go before him unto the other side, while he sent the multitudes away. And when he had sent the multitudes away, he went up into a mountain apart to pray: and when the evening was come, he was there alone. But the ship was now in the midst of the sea, tossed with waves: for the wind was contrary. And in the fourth watch of the night Jesus went unto them, walking on the sea. And when the disciples saw him walking on the sea, they were troubled, saying, It is a spirit; and they cried out for fear. But straightway Jesus spake unto them, saying, Be of good cheer; it is I; be not afraid. And Peter answered him and said, Lord, if it be thou, bid me come unto thee on the water. And he said, Come. And when Peter was come down out of the ship, he walked on the water, to go to Jesus. But when he saw the wind boisterous, he was afraid; and beginning to sink, he cried, saying, Lord, save me. And immediately Jesus stretched forth his hand, and caught him, and said unto him, O thou of little faith, wherefore didst thou doubt?"
See Peter was already walking on the water, going towards Jesus, when he allowed what was happening around him, the stormy winds, to cause doubt and fear, and when that happened began to sink. Just like Peter, you are experiencing doubts and fears and this is what is keeping you from feeling His presence. There can be a lot of different reasons why you experiencing these doubts. Perhaps it is what others around you are saying, or what you have read in book or magazines, or seen on TV or movies, or even satan, who may be
tempting you with these doubts and causing you to question whether God exists. Whatever the reason, there is one cure. Faith. God is always there, you KNOW He is real because you have felt Him before, and as you stated, you have asked for and gotten signs from Him. As you grow older, you may have questions about God, but this is not a bad thing. Allowing others to influence or decide what you believe is. God tells us to search for Him with all our hearts and He will reveal Himself to us. Among the many ways God reveals Himself to us is through His Word, and through the Holy Spirit. Open your heart and mind and spend more time with Him in prayer and with the Holy Spirit, and reading your Bible and studies. This will strengthen your Faith and once you allow faith to replace your fears, you will be able to feel Him again. Pray more about this :) GBU always.
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| hannah tucker asks... |
6/25/2007 9:48:43 AM |
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Dear Gabby: |
i am a shy girl who has a crush on a boy in church, a BIG crush. problem is i dont think he likes me, i think he likes another girl. shes skinny and im chubby. ive tried to loose weight, but its so hard. what can i do to make him notice me? im too shy to even talk to him.... |
Answer: |
Dear Hannah,
Thanks for writing in. It can be hard to make new friends especially when we are self conscious about the way we look or how different we are from others. But we need to remember that God made us all different from each other. He gave us all different gifts and talents. There is no one out there that is the exact replica of someone else. He meant for us to be Unique. If He wanted us to all look the same, He would have created us that way. Most people will tell you that there is at least one thing about themselves that they wished they could change, and more often than not, it is related to physical appearance. This is cuz the world has set a specific standard of beauty that is dependant on external appearance only, and constantly bombards us with this thru images in magazines, tv, movies, etc. People think that if they do not look like those on the magazine covers or on tv, that they are not good enough. Most are not aware of the many tricks used in promoting this idea of worldly beauty. Models starve themselves to be skinny, despite risks to their health. Photographs are airbrushed to perfection. Plastic surgery is used to permanently change what one deems imperfect. And then it is marketed to us to try and encourage us to look the way these people do. But is this what God wants for us ? He created us all as Individuals. Unique and special in our own ways, and each of us equal and loved in His eyes. If someone likes you only for the way you look, then that is gonna be a big problem at some point, if not now, then later on down the road. Because our external appearance does not stay the same. The body ages and is affected by disease and lifestyle, and what was once considered handsome or beautiful, is now considered yesterday's news. One has only to look at those same models and movie stars that everyone wants to be like. They are in the spotlight for a short time and then forgotten about and replaced with someone else. The world judges us by how look and what we have, but God looks within, at our hearts. Whose opinion counts more? His or other people's ? Maybe one of the reasons why you feel shy to talk to this boy, is cuz God wants you to focus your attention on other things right now, like serving Him and seeking His will in your life. And when the time is right, when God wills it, you will meet that special person and He will give you the courage you need to go up and talk to them and begin building a friendship. Put God first,and all the rest will fall into place.
Matt 6:33: But seek ye first the kingdom of God, and his righteousness; and all these things shall be added unto you.
In the meantime, stay true to the person God created you to be. Be the unique Hannah that He loves and cherishes. Stand proud and REPRESENT Jesus and set an example for those around you who may be in danger of falling prey to the lies of the world. Let them know that true beauty comes from within.
Pray more about this. |
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| A little un comfortable asks... |
5/30/2007 11:31:15 PM |
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Dear Gabby: |
Hi,my problem is, when i hang around my friends I try to get them involved with God when the subject comes up, but none of them relly believe and I kind of feel like i'm pushing but i want them to be saved, they respect that i have my beliefs, am i respecting their space if i keep trying to convert them? What should i do? |
Answer: |
Dear A little un comfortable,
What a loving child of God you are to care enough about your friends to want them to be able to have the gift of Grace and Forgiveness and Eternal Life that you have received. However, you need to be careful that your intense desire to convert them to Christianity doesnt actually do the opposite of what you are trying to accomplish. You stated that you kind of feel like you are pushing, and if you feel that way, chances are that this is what is happening. As it is now, your friends respect your beliefs, and you are able to share with them about God, but if you continue to push, this may change. Many Christians, in their passion and enthusiasm to share the love of God and the truth of Jesus with others, sometimes appear overbearing to those who they are trying to reach. This can discourage potential Christians, as they may become overwhelmed. This in no way means that you are to give up trying to lead your friends to Christ, but if you find that one way isnt quite working out the way you want it, you may consider doing this in other ways. One of the best ways to share the love of Jesus with those around you, is to let your fruits reflect Him. That is, let your words and deeds represent God. The way you speak, act and react, dress, the music you listen to, the movies you look at, your values and morals, all of your characteristics, can be a powerful testimony of what God can do in a person's life. Continue to set the example and let your light shine, and those who are in the dark, will see your light and desire to have that too. Remember, we are called upon to share the truth of Jesus with those who do not know of Him, but we cannot force someone to become a Christian, no matter how much we care about them and want them to be saved. They are the ones who must choose to believe in Him. We can only plant the seeds, and God does the increase. Pray more about this.
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| need some advice asks... |
5/25/2007 11:41:10 PM |
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Dear Gabby: |
i like this guy and he says he loves me so much that he doesnt want to hurt me is that a good thing or a bab thing? |
Answer: |
Dear need some advice,
I think it is definitely a good thing when someone cares enough about you to be honest and upfront with you, instead of leading you on and deceiving you. You should be glad that your friend chose to be truthful, as it will allow both of you the opportunity to continue to grow as friends, instead of him encouraging another type of relationship that may end in tears and heartbreak, because one party is not ready or as commited as the other.Many times, what we want or think is best for us, may not be God's Will for us. God has the best possible plan for each of His children, and we need to trust in Him and His timing. He sees ALL, whereas our vision is limited. What may appear to be negative or hurtful, can actually turn out to be a blessing in disguise, as it may save us from further hurt and pain later on in our lives. Pray about this and seek God's Will in your life.
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| confused love asks... |
5/23/2007 8:08:26 PM |
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Dear Gabby: |
Dear GABBY,
I'M scared that i start liking people in church and have less time with God. idk if i'm starting to like someone but I just don't want to fall for the traps. I want to keep going the way i am and also don't want to get hurt by the crushes.Already had in school. |
Answer: |
Dear confused,
Sounds to me like you are less confused and more on the right path than you think. You seem to have a pretty solid head on your shoulders, and already know what you want your first priority to be, and that is GOD. This is the way it should be. Him first and all the rest will fall into place.Matt 6:33: But seek ye first the kingdom of God, and his righteousness; and all these things shall be added unto you. Use the lessons learned from your past experiences to help you identify and steer clear of the traps of temptation that so many young people fall prey to, because they seek other humans or material things to bring love and happiness to their lives. You already know the truth, that God is the source of Love and Joy, and keeping this truth close to your heart, will help you to make the right decisions when it comes to relationships. Always remember, it is best to wait for the right one, that person that God has chosen for you, than to settle for just anyone. When God sends your soul mate to you, you will be ready and will not fear, as His timing is perfect. In the meantime, continue to do all you can to glorify God.Psalms 37:4: Delight thyself also in the LORD; and he shall give thee the desires of thine heart.Re-affirm your commitment to Him by becoming involved in activities where you help others and do His Will. Surround yourself with other Christian teens who are striving to put God first in their lives,who share the same beliefs as you do, and will be able to encourage and support you in your Christian walk. Worry not about what might happen, but trust in the Lord and allow Him to lead you. Pray more about this. Here is a great program that will show you how you can use your spiritual gifts to glorify God http://www.christianityoasis.com/MyBrothersKeeper/Forum.htm |
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